Date: Wed, 24 Dec 1997 07:24:35 -0800 From: starbird@sj.bigger.net To: cp@opus.hpl.hp.com Message-Id: <aabcdefg4812$foo@default> Subject: Christmas and CPs
Hi CP Lovers:
Just thought you'd like to read this story hot off
the Associated Press Syndicate:
SANTA CLAUS ARRESTED IN INDONESIA
The Indonesian government announced today that it
has arrested Santa Claus and thrown him in prison.
It is expected that Santa Claus will be caned for
his offenses.
Indonesian government troops discovered Santa
Claus on a routine patrol of the mount Kinabalu
area. He had apparently parked his sleigh and was
rooting up dozens of Nepenthes plants when he was
caught. His sleigh was filled with several hundred
bags full of rare carnivorous plants. Also found
in the haul were thousands of nickel-sized venus
fly trap bulbs in bags marked "Cape Fear".
When asked why he was taking all of the endangered
plants, the not-so-jolly man replied "I'm just
trying to make people happy. You wouldn't believe
what those people at the ICPS and the carnivorous
plant news group want for Christmas. Every year it's
the same thing! I'm sick of it! I should be
in the workshop helping the elves fill the sleigh, but
no, I'm out here slogging through jungles, getting
malaria, and getting mud all over me trying to find
these bizarre plants. I just wish they would all
grow Sarracenia and leave me alone! Do you know
what it's like trying to wrap Drosera? I get this
sticky crap all over my hands!"
The Indonesian government says, after Santa is
caned, he will be deported. However, the sleigh
and reindeer have been confiscated and will not
be returned. "We are wary of any man dressed in
red." one government official commented. "We were
worried that Mr. Santa Claus was a communist. That
is apparently not the case, but he is, however, a
common criminal from a corrupt western culture."
Santa Claus could not be reached for further comment.
---Steve
Merry Christmas to all CPers!
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