Date: Mon, 24 Aug 1998 20:25:02 -0700 From: starbird@sj.bigger.net To: cp@opus.hpl.hp.com Message-Id: <aabcdefg2796$foo@default> Subject: Interesting CP movies
Hi:
Here are some short descriptions and titles of some interesting
films that contain CPs.
ANGRY RED PLANET
This late 1950's film, shot through a red filter, follows the
adventures of several astronauts (including one woman) who
land their rocketship on the surface of Mars. One of the
first things that happens to them is getting attacked by
carnivorous plants on their first excursion. Worse still,
as they approach a martian city in their inflatable rubber
boat, they are forced to paddle for their lives as a giant
amoeba rises from a martian lake to chase them back to
their ship. Needless to say, this is no ordinary amoeba, as
it has an eye that rotates like a police car light and it
absorbs people in frothy goo. (And don't miss the giant
spider-mouse).
THE LOST CONTINENT
This late 1960's British film follows the adventures of a bunch of
seafarers whose tramp steamer becomes locked in an impassible
sargasso sea. The locals, mainly big-breasted women, walk
on top of the seaweed using snowshoes and helium balloons. (If
you are too heavy, the seaweed will eat you). To escape, they
must fight an army of spaniards who live in a galleon that has
a trap door. If they offend the "El Supremo", a ten-year old
all powerful conquistador, his cronies open the trap door and
throw them to another carnivorous plant. (Hint: the heroes
have explosives on their ship and let the carnivorous plants
have it)
THE GREEN SLIME
For all you utricularia fans, this is another late 1960's British
film about a space station over earth that is attacked by a slimy
alien plant.
THE THING
As if eating your vegetables can be a bad thing, explorers bring
back an alien being they find locked in the ice. But, they leave
an electric blanket on (This is the 1950's version, you know)
and it melts the thing to life. The Thing is a vegetable with a
craving for blood. It starts little plants in the arctic greenhouse
and feeds them with IV bottles full of blood. When the explorers
trash his carnivorous plant collection, the Thing comes after
them with a vengeance, and they are forced to fry it with
a 1950's version of electro-shock therapy.
NAVY VS. THE NIGHT MONSTERS
The U.S. Navy, in this early 1960's epic, brings back a planeload
of plants they find in the antarctic. The tropical paradise island
the sailors live on becomes a living hell when the plants sprout,
grow, and attack them (Check out the scene where one guy loses
a phoney arm to one of the plants). Fortunately, being on the
edge of the Vietnam Era, the Navy comes up with a solution.
They napalm the plants and the world is saved.
DAY OF THE TRIFFIDS
This British epic from the early 1960's, made from a book that was
much better than the film, follows a man who wakes up in the hospital
only to discover that most everyone in the world has been blinded
by a meteor shower and the earth has been invaded by carnivorous
plants that, for some reason, look like ladyslipper orchids. Hmmm...
the producers needed a botany lesson. He discovers that two things
can kill the plants...saltwater...and ICPS members.
LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS
I'm talking here about the 1950's beatnick film that became a cult
classic. I saw it as a kid, but haven't been able to find it anywhere
since. Black and white. Feed me.
RETURN OF THE JEDI
Don't know if they tried to throw Luke Skywalker to a creature,
or a plant. But it deserves worthy mention here. How they were able
to defeat the empire's ground forces with logs and spears and
teddy bears, I'll never be able to figure out.
BEAST WITH A MILLION EYES
This 1950's film, Lee Van Cleef's first starring role, pits the army
against a creature from Venus that lives in a cave in southern
California. When it finally appears, and fights Van Cleef, it is
an upside down carrot, with mean beady little eyes, and crab claws.
The creature gets the upper hand, or claw, and crunches Van Cleef,
but not before Van Cleef blowtorches the creature in the eyes, making
(literally) Hershey syrup pour out (this is black and white). Here's
a great quote as Van Cleef is reasoning with the creature..."You
have made my planet a charnel house!"
THE SWAMP THING
This 1980's film, with the busty Adrienne Barbeau (sp?), stays true
to the comic book when plant DNA mixes with the male anatomy and
produces John Wayne made of spinach. It's very hard to shoot
salad greens, especially when he's on the side of good.
...
Well, as you can see, watching old bad films is how I spent most
of my childhood. But it was a very entertaining education and
taught me a lot about science and astronomy. For example... a
rocket ship needs only 3 days to get to Mars. There are still
large areas of the South Atlantic that are unexplored and impassible
by most ships. Space is a pandora's box of horrors, particularly
so when it comes to plant life. The arctic regions contain only
frozen monsters waiting to come to life to eat us. Plant and animal
DNA mix all the time, on earth and on other worlds, to create
bloodthirsty creatures that inhabit caves or turn into green
superheroes. Don't look at the stars at night, you could
go blind and get eaten by orchids.
Have a great week!
---Steve Klitzing
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